Departments



Articles

Editorial: Anti-Environmental Bill: Save Florida From Harm
May 16th, 2013

Editorial: Problem Ordinances
May 8th, 2012

Editorial: Cedar Key Arts Show
April 28th, 2012

Editorial: Cedar Key Arts Show
April 20th, 2012

Editorial: Status of Nuclear Power as Savior
March 15th, 2012

Editorial: Advice to Letter Writers
February 13th, 2012

Editorial: 2011 is History
January 7th, 2012

Editorial: The History of Island Nations
December 24th, 2011

Editorial: Why You DON’T Pay for the Cedar Key News Online
November 11th, 2011

Editorial: Hoppin’ John ***
November 3rd, 2011

Editorial: What Decline?
October 10th, 2011

Editorial: Notes from a Slightly Bigger Island
October 8th, 2011

Editorial: Barking Mad
October 5th, 2011

Editorial: Fix the Bridges!
September 11th, 2011

Editorial: Catching the Right Wave
July 27th, 2011

More

Support Groups

Support Groups

Robin McClary

I've had some conversations with local clergy concerning support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous, where recovering alcoholics receive the support of others in the same predicament. I wondered why there weren't more such groups in this area. I was told that the local culture looked down on the idea of supporting one another. "Suck it up! Be a man! Be tough!" I know the cry well.

My oldest son, Michael, was murdered on Christmas Eve over thirty-five years ago. I don't need to tell you of the pain that I have carried in my heart for all these years. I have not celebrated Christmas since that day.

I did not even speak of his death until just recently when I was passing the time of day with a psychologist friend of mine. We were talking about a story on the TV news about a child that had been killed in an accident. In the middle of our conversation, I began to cry. Then I told him about my son's death, so many years ago.

He suggested that I go to a support group in Gainesville that was made up of people who shared the experience of a dead child. I didn't feel very comfortable about this group. It was hard enough to bear my own pain, without feeling someone else's. But, I went.

We sat around in a group and shared our experiences. It was an immediate comfort to realize that I was not alone in my grief and that I could speak about my sorrow for the first time in many years. Being able to talk about Michael, with people who could understand my dilemma, released and resolved some of my pain. On the advice of the group, I went to Miami and cast a wreath on the water where I had scattered his ashes. I finally realized that I had never said goodbye to my dead son.

Please understand that supporting each other is one of the things that make us human. The next time you encounter someone who seeks the help of one of these support groups, shake their hand and congratulate them. And find out what you can do for someone else.

Click for printer friendly version

Email this article to a friend

 

 

© 2013
Cedar Key News

cedarkeynews@gmail.com