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Editorial: What Have We Learned?
September 3rd, 2005

Editorial: Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace
August 17th, 2005

Editorial: What Is a Consultant to Do?
July 5th, 2005

Editorial: Six Land Use Petitions in Play
June 25th, 2005

Editorial: Poaching & Plagiarism
June 13th, 2005

Editorial: Upward and Onward in 2005
May 24th, 2005

Editorial: Farewell Maureen
May 17th, 2005

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May 10th, 2005

Editorial: Informed Voters Wanted
March 26th, 2005

Editorial: Health Needs Survey Well Received
February 12th, 2005

Editorial: Fire Protection, Fire Insurance and Tax Justice
January 25th, 2005

Editorial: Cedar Key Health Service Survey
January 14th, 2005

Editorial: New Year`s Resolution
December 31st, 2004

Editorial: Do We Need Better Healthcare in Cedar Key?
December 16th, 2004

Editorial: Help Defend Us
October 29th, 2004

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Support Groups

Support Groups

Robin McClary

I've had some conversations with local clergy concerning support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous, where recovering alcoholics receive the support of others in the same predicament. I wondered why there weren't more such groups in this area. I was told that the local culture looked down on the idea of supporting one another. "Suck it up! Be a man! Be tough!" I know the cry well.

My oldest son, Michael, was murdered on Christmas Eve over thirty-five years ago. I don't need to tell you of the pain that I have carried in my heart for all these years. I have not celebrated Christmas since that day.

I did not even speak of his death until just recently when I was passing the time of day with a psychologist friend of mine. We were talking about a story on the TV news about a child that had been killed in an accident. In the middle of our conversation, I began to cry. Then I told him about my son's death, so many years ago.

He suggested that I go to a support group in Gainesville that was made up of people who shared the experience of a dead child. I didn't feel very comfortable about this group. It was hard enough to bear my own pain, without feeling someone else's. But, I went.

We sat around in a group and shared our experiences. It was an immediate comfort to realize that I was not alone in my grief and that I could speak about my sorrow for the first time in many years. Being able to talk about Michael, with people who could understand my dilemma, released and resolved some of my pain. On the advice of the group, I went to Miami and cast a wreath on the water where I had scattered his ashes. I finally realized that I had never said goodbye to my dead son.

Please understand that supporting each other is one of the things that make us human. The next time you encounter someone who seeks the help of one of these support groups, shake their hand and congratulate them. And find out what you can do for someone else.

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